The Idea of 'me' Is Only A Thought

The idea of me is only a thought, nothing more. When this is seen clearly, without doubt, then everything just is, without judgment, without worry, without longings and wishing for unfulfilled desires.

Only a ‘me’ can suffer in the seeming reality of the conceptual. The ‘mind’ as it were, is the only device that produces the idea of suffering. There’s the conjured thought of a person, then that which is in opposition to that person, and thus begins the suffering (yes, pain can arise in the organism, but suffering is optional).

All appearance is just what is arising in the present moment, raw data as Randall Friend puts it, then the so called mind gets a hold of this information and translates it into a conceptual world, seemingly full of persons and their corresponding problems.

The ego cringes at the thought of not existing; this is a sticking point for most seekers. As soon as the ‘self’ is faced with its nonexistence, which is really only the thought of the self juxtaposed with a contrary thought, the resistance kicks in full force.

Persevere in the face of this resistance. As long as the belief is there of a person, investigate that, question that idea. This cannot be a half hearted look see, it must be stripped down to the core, brought out into the light and exposed. There’s no substitution for this. An intellectual understanding will not do anything but put a lot of concepts in there and enable the body/mind organism to mimic the words.

Only a true understanding will do, and understanding is all. Understanding is what you are seeking, and that very understanding is the Essence that You Are. Seeing the conceptual as only appearance and truly knowing that you are none of that as an individual, but the totality of it a whole, nothing separate.

Look, keep looking, and the seeing this is all there is or ever was will become apparent, to no one, and the Essence shines forth with no thoughts dictating that existence.

Happy Conceptual New Year!

At this beginning of what is believed to be a new year, many resolutions are made, as it seems like a new beginning. As day rolls into night on December 31st and at midnight we sing Auld Lang Syne, what meaning does this have except that it has been decided by popular demand that this New Year is to be celebrated, that something old has ended and something new has begun.

We have many celebrations throughout the year, but we do not celebrate the beginning of a new month. Why not? It seems as much like a new beginning as a new year.

The new year comes and resolutions are made and kept for maybe a week or two, if that long. Then the old pattern is fallen back into and nothing is really any different than before except that the calendar looks different, the body has aged a little, and there may be some depression about not being able to stick with a diet, or quitting a bad habit.

Years of conditioning seem to accompany the body/mind organism, and a wish that on the conceptual idea of a date change doesn’t seem to make any difference. It just happens as it happens.

What can be looked at is that these resolutions are just being made, but that there is no one there making any of them. The thoughts come up because this is the way the machine was programmed, for that reason and nothing more. There’s no need for depression over a failure to commit, that’s just the way the machine works. It’ll either make a commitment and stick to it, or it won’t. Along those lines, it’ll also allow for depression to arise, or it won’t, and the words will either have an effect or they won’t. This all depends on the way the mechanism perceives appearances based on conditioning.

After all that, this may not mean as much, but here is sincerely wishing you all a Happy New Year and a Wonderful Eternal Now!

Love,

jd

Another Note Regarding Email:

When you write, please include something in the subject box.  The spam filter is on, and sometimes emails will go there.  I'll check it from time to time to make sure there are no new emails going there by accident.

From now on when after the first email, I'll put your address in the address book to ensure tht it arives.  You may want to just hit the comment button here on this blog to make sure I check your email. 
Also, you may want to just use the comment button to ask your question.

thatwhichalwaysis@yahoo.com

Chat About Clear Seeing

The following is was taken from a live chat.

_________________________________________________


Q. Yes - and what has also been a blessing/challenge is that i have had glimpses of Awareness, and then got sucked back into my character. I realize the glimpses are part of the show and appearances as such, but are the tease that keep me looking

J. What's actually happening when those glimpses occur is that you seeing what is clear, and everything is natural, the rest of the time what is seen is an illusion that all is not right, this has to be firmly believed. Keep looking back to see for whom these glimpses are occurring, are they occurring for a separate entity, or is clear seeing just happening?

Q. It is just seeing - for no one in particular - but "something/sense" is seeing this

J. Yes, and all the rest goes on just as before, but there's a clarity that there's no one in particular here, there, or anywhere. The story still plays on without the vested interest that was believed to be there before

Q. Yes

J. What you don't want to do is gauge this by appearances, seemingly bad crap will come up daily, and the mind will respond according to past conditioning

Q. There seems to be some vested interest here. I can't see who or why - for no one really. I no longer expect anything, there's nothing to attain, it really is just clear seeing all the time that hasn't remained permanent.


I get that, bad crap will come up and I no longer think that it shouldn't (although I did think that for a while). As sailor bob says, all thoughts are like clouds and they don't stick around here for too long (good or bad)

J. Yea, like he says, when you don't feed them, they die. When you don't give them attention, they don't hang around, or better said, when there's no attention given to them. The same thoughts that make come up to make us feel bad are the same thoughts that say here's a person here, they are just phantoms arising in the moment, creating the image of a
person, a person with problems, and all that.

Q. Yes - and there does seem to be some connection here that doesn't let all the clouds float by, although I intellectually know better

J. There's a fixation on the appearance, there is still a residual belief that all that means something for somebody

Q. And that is seen through with final acceptance that the false self is a group of thoughts?

J. Yes, with a knowing that the "self" is only a thought, no more significant than any other thought, and what's left is the clarity of who you are, there's no longer a central character

John Wheeler starts from the positive side and states that you are, and you know you are,
that's the only thing that can be known for certain, then he goes on to question the other side
of it, that there's no person, and this is what worked here, the long held cherished belief in and
person called JD was rooted out and exposed. Once that happened, the clarity and obviousness of my true being, the true essence was seen clearly

Q. I have followed the same logic - but not yet that clear feel like I am on the outside of an inside joke - I am looking for my glasses and everyone in the room can clearly see they are on my head, but I can't find them - frustrating

J. Just stay after it, that's the best pointer I can give on it, if there has been any clear seeing at all, that's half the battle, so to speak.

Q. Yes - sometimes a sense comes over me to relax and roll with life and this will work itself out as it needs to and can't be forced - that usually brings about some relief

J. It's impossible to explain colors to a person blind since birth, there's no reference point, but there's been a glimpse of clarity there, lock onto that.

Q. But that only lasts a few hours and then something has me back at it!
I have to be careful I think not to chase my past glimpses as experiences to be attained

J. Ok, even when it seems that you’ve been pulled back in, let the knowing be there that you've never really gone anywhere, this is just an illusion that there's a "you" is pulled back in, because in reality, you are the same as when there is clear seeing as was there those few hours.

Q. Ok

J. It's true not to chase experiences, but what you are is not an experience

Q. Understood

J. You're not trying to get something that you don't already have, don't try to recreate experience, that is doomed to failure, that keeps the mind going after a thing

Q. that is clear now - wasn't previously

J. Just know that in those moments, that is the really you, and the rest of the time, it's just appearances

Q. Is Awareness the one asking the questions and does it use the mind to do so?

J. The questions are just being asked, there is no one doing it, awareness knows the questions
Awareness has no questions, You have no questions, questions are just arising
The mind cannot grasp this, and it doesn't need to

Q. Sometimes the questions just seem mechanical, like repeating something you have learned, but don't always have the bite

J. The questions come from the mind, and what is that? Just a collection of thoughts, just thoughts arising moment by moment

Q. Ok

J. This is the clear seeing, seeing the false for what it is
this is the understanding

Q. What blew me away was the absolute simplicity of it all - just so natural and real and connected

J. When seemingly bad stuff is going on, it feels like that's happening to someone because that was believed in so long, let the feelings arise, just notice that this is happening, but to no one, just like an event you see on a movie screen happening to a character, you know that's not really happening, but it makes for a good show

Don't take my word for any of this, see it from your own direct experience

Q. Ok - you have certainly confirmed everything I was already sensing - which is good. I know that no one can do this for me - it is my own direct experiencing as you noted - totally agree

J. Good that you see this, that's another part that many never seem to get past.
So many like the idea that they are going to get something, that's the thinking process, which is
useful for actually getting stuff like food for survival, that's what it was intended to do, but it has
no business defining who you are, animals don't have this dilemma, they never have to seek out
enlightenment or any such goal, they simply are a part of the whole, and everything flows along
naturally.
__________________________________________________

Note:  If you would like arrange a live text chat, or a phone consultation, write to thatwhichalwaysis@yahoo.com

Either yahoo or hotmail chats are available.

Names are never divulged.

Email Problems: If You've Written But Haven't Gotten A Response

To anyone who has written and not gotten a response. Evidently the spam filter is set too high and blocked some who have written.  Most have come through on the first time, but then end up in the spam folder.  I've neglected to check there as I believed that it was ok.  I'll be changing the settings, so rest assured that if you write, I will respond.

I would never not respond to an email, so if for any reason you do not get a response withing a couple days, post a comment here on any post on this blog and that'll get my attention. 

If it's been more than a month, your email has been lost in the spam folder. If you have it still, please send it again. 

Eternal Love,

jd

thatwhichalwaysis@yahoo.com

What Truth Are You Looking For?

It would seem that many write in search of some truth. When the pointers are offered and they do not mesh with the idea of what that “truth” should be, the writing discontinues. The mind has all sorts of notions about what “truth” is, about some idea of an enlightenment, then when it hears that the mind doesn’t even exist, or that there really is no enlightenment, it says, “No, no, I want something that’s “me” friendly, something that I can enjoy”. And so it runs off in some other direction, continuously seeking, never finding, but always on the road to nowhere.

This is the big stumbling block that keeps most seekers seeking. The mind doesn’t want the search to end, it wants a course of action, the game of trying to find a cure for what ails ya, the ongoing struggle. This is why to measure any form of understanding with the mind's points of reference is doomed to failure. There is a belief there that there’s a person, and this person is going to gain something, to get somewhere. This is in the mind, this is the mind, this is the illusion, the veil of confusion that keeps the truth of your being from being seen.

If this can be seen when it comes up, then the hump can be gotten over. When words are spoken that do not ring with some conditioned notion about what is going to gained, the thoughts arise saying “This ain’t it, lets look somewhere else”. That happened here more than once, and only by grace did the return to these teachings arise. There was a resonance that broke through the darkness and the light was seen clearly.  If your seach has gone on long enough, stop looking at the words, but look to where the words are pointing, and you'll find that what you've been searching for has been there all along.

thatwhichalwaysis@yahoo.com

Searching For Answers

Q. I am writing for a bit of help.

I have spent lots of time talking to teachers, but for whatever reason things really have not hit home.

J. Sometimes the words do not resonate, and at other times they do. We’ll see if anything I say resonates with you.

Q. Perhaps it is because I have a very good friend who I trust who says ultimately there is nothing I can do.. and investigation will not help in this.

J. To say that there is nothing you can do misses the point. As long as there’s a belief in a separate person, and there is or else this wouldn’t be a problem, then question that idea, question it until it fizzles out, until it is burned up in the nothingness that it is.

You Are right now, it’s just a matter of getting those notions of a person out of the way and seeing who You Are.

Q. I don’t really believe that investigation will work though, I don’t believe not investigating will work either.

J. Look to see who it is that doesn’t believe this, the look to see who is investigating this, is there really a separate self there, or is that just an idea that comes up in the moment stating that “I am this person”. The key is to see past the illusion of time, because only in memory and imagination does time exist, and that is the only place that the “person” exists. Right now, in this moment, without thinking about it, who are you?

 Q. What am I looking for is to rest away from all this. I am looking for the end of seeking that most talk about..Freedom.  I can’t just believe one bunch of words versus another...I can’t really believe any of it..Understanding is not it.. Understanding is understanding.

J. I know this sounds repetitive, but look to see who is looking for an end, that person will never gain any freedom, who You Are is not in bondage right now, only the seeking and searching says otherwise, and that’s all based on the assumption that you are a separate individual. This is the understanding that Nisargadatta was talking about when he said that “Understanding is all”. It’s not an intellectual understanding, it is the underlying truth that allows all illusion to appear.

Q. Your latest post was quite good as it hit home a little in the sense that I could relate to it.. You know the idea that when the story is not going well then there is a rejection of what is..So that sums me UP.

J. Just notice the story, sometimes it seems fun and other times it seems to be a nightmare, but at the end of it all, it is only a story, just as one you would see on television.

Notice too that the rejection of what is, is still part of the story. Until this is seen clearly, it’s just like the character in a play or movie that doesn’t understand why all this is happening to him, when he realizes that it’s a show, he understands what’s going on.

Q. I could say At this stage “I will never get it” but behind that is the hope that I will get it.

J. Please get clear on this, “you” will never get it. I know everyone says this, but this is the truth. This is why you’ve never gotten it, it’s two fold; there’s no “you” to get, and there’s no thing to get because what You Are, is what you seek.

Drop the idea of stages and processes. This will keep you going around in the mind looking for answers. I know, that happened here for a long time, until it was looked into and seen that all that searching was just a game, just like any other self gratifying endeavors.


Q. Yes it is always in the future.

J. There’s really no future, that’s a concept.

Q. So I suppose I keep going in the hope that a word from here or there will bring it to an end.

J. No word will make you any more that what you are right now. Words are concepts and to focus too much on the words keeps you look at the finger instead of the moon it is pointing to. Listen without ears, feel the meaning of what the words are pointing to.

Q. And yes the end of seeking is only a concept in my head. A thought. But if you can remember, you read so much that you assume that there is a happening. Yes another thought.

J. You’re waiting for something to happen for “you”, stop looking for that. Sure an experience might come up, but it will fall away as well. Anything that changes is not what you are look for. You Are, Now!

Q. I see that thoughts are not controllable. I see that they are totally dictated by surroundings and memories.

J. Thoughts just rise and set, they just dance around, sometimes in a fury, but they are only thoughts, nothing but whiffs of energy passing in the present moment, and in all those thoughts arise the thought of “me” and “mine” and so on, this is all that is.

They are indeed just replays of what was observed, it’s just like a recording devices, playing back a version of what passed before it, playing back the idea of a person.

Q. That is not to say that I don’t get lost in them VERY often. How can I not get lost in thought when I AM IN THERE AMONGST ALL THESE THOUGHTs.. (had some clarity there for a moment and then I came back again looking to remember the clarity).

J. This seeming “self” seemingly gets lost in thoughts because it is just another thought. That’s how sometimes thoughts we seem to get so involved in thoughts that the self is lost, the idea of the self is gone because it was only another thought. The real You is always present and aware, never controlled by thoughts, never moved by the content, no matter how it seems to the mind.

Q. Some talk about the newness of things. That everything that happens is brand new. So that is not felt here. And some talk with clarity on this subject and I know I cannot talk with clarity on this matter. I could repeat other words but they would not be truth from what is felt here. They would not be speaking from experience.. which says to me that there is still something I am not getting.

J. Everything is new in the present moment, new and old have no meaning actually, they are only concepts. Everything arises moment by moment, without past or future. The word fresh would be a better way of expressing, but then again, all words fail.

Look into your own experience, don’t look at what happened to others. Sure it seems inspiring, but it keeps you chasing something you think they have. Just look and see that You Are, and that’s all that can be known for sure, you exist, and everything else is conceptual.

Start from that pure knowing that you are, without adding anything to it, then look to see if the “person” exists, right now, in this moment, without going into memory, what person is there? Look deeply into this.

Q. And perhaps it is the fact that I believe thoughts. How can I not believe thoughts though?

J. Do you believe all thoughts? Some thoughts come to mind that you don’t believe. Probably at one time the thought of Santa was believed to be the real, then when it was seen through, the idea was still there, but no longer believed.

Thoughts are believed because that’s where you’ve looked so long for answers. Ultimately all thoughts are false, all concepts are false, but we use them to communicate.

This is all not “coming together” because of the angle from which you are approaching it. Give up all ideas about enlightenment or whatever awakening that you hold and just see it clearly. If there is clear seeing here, there can be clear seeing there, if the suffering ended here, it can end there.

Q. Perhaps JD there is nothing you can say to me. I have now spoken to so many teachers/writers on this subject. And I have so many wonderfully useless concepts.
And yet I am still here knocking on your front door will my tail wagging and asking you to tell me where my tail is.

J. All concepts are wonderfully useless. Just see what is being pointed to, and maybe these words will guide you to the destination you never left, as John Greven puts it. Every “teacher” has his/her own style of doing this, it’s just a matter of what resonates deeply with you.

The tail is the same place the mind is, in the dream. Please stay in touch and let me know how this goes and anymore questions that arise.

thatwhichalwaysis@yahoo.com